Telling Your Friends About Your New Love
This article was written recently when a close friend was relaying his experiences with the women he had met through a phone sex dating line. He was excited and very enthusiastic about sharing his experiences and seeking advice about what he should do next.
If you’ve just started dating someone then they’re fresh, new and exciting and it can be tempting to tell your friends all about your new love. While it’s nice to have friends who you’ll want to confide in and it’s good to share things about your relationships, it’s not a good idea to rush to them every time you’re in the glow of a new relationship.
Let’s face it, in the early days when you’re dating someone, everything is exciting and fun and the relationship seems perfect. That period usually doesn’t last more than a few month and you could find yourself feeling emotionally, up and down about the relationship, while you’re getting to know the person. Your friends will always want to take your side if they don’t know the person – so they’re not really qualified to give good advice. They could quickly become frustrated if they notice a pattern of being ditched when someone exciting comes along, then being picked up again when they’re single and feeling down.
It’s OK to talk in general terms about the relationships you’re in, but tread carefully. Don’t give specifics unless you would be comfortable with the idea of your lover telling their friends the same sort of thing about you.
It’s a good idea to let friends know you’re going on a date. It’s OK to answer questions about your dating habits if they ask, but for the most part, keep your relationships quiet until you reach the stage where you feel ready to introduce your friends to your new partner. That will help to avoid awkward situations where you need to tell lots of people about a ‘break up’ that could have happened, when, after a few dates you decided, amicably, to pursue a different relationship.
The less of a big deal you make dating, the less stress you will feel and the less you will need to worry about whether or not things are going to work out. Get used to communicating with your friends, get used to talking honestly with them in general term but understand that your love life is yours and yours alone and no-one else needs to know what is going on. They care and they will be glad if things are going well and sad if you’re feeling down, but life isn’t a soap opera, they don’t need to know all the ins and outs of your relationship.
It’s YOUR love life, not your friends. So work out what it is that you really, really want….